life advice quote motivational quote lifestyle blog

 

flat mate love at home

When you fancy your flat mate so you put on your lipstick and heels to stay home

Hi, I’m sorry I’m so busy right now. I’ll call you back in-between panic attacks

drinking no alcohol

Well done! You’ve gone 0 days without booze

 

wine-life advice-lifestyle

The only thing I don’t like about a large glass of wine, is that you can’t fill the stem

Don’t be a tampon soaking up other people’s nonsense. Be a cunt.

 

Live in the moment, except when you have chronic diarrhoea