GETTING MORE FROM YOUR TAMPON

It’s costly having to spend money involuntarily each month on Tampons and Towels and with the added 5% tax we have to pay too, 1 in 10 girls can’t afford to buy them. But it’s not just the cost of the sanitary products it’s also the money that’s spent each month on pain relief, supplements and general stuff to aid us through the hell of The Blob.

I think the sanitary products we have available are so out-dated and boring. Can’t we Vajazzle them up a bit? I’d like to get more from my lady sticks so that I don’t have to spend extra on the other stuff. For example: a tampon laced in Ibuprofen, glow in the dark tampons and towels so we can find them in a drawer or cupboard without having to turn on the light.

I have further suggestions. A pad that extracts fat. I would then actually look forward to ketchup week rather than feeling plugged and drugged. A tampon that releases vitamins to help your hormones through PMT or tampons with positive affirmations hanging from each string or rolled up inside each towel that can cheer you up and lift your mood during that time of the month. Like ‘Just remember, in a few days you will feel 2 stone lighter and you will like people again’ and ‘Don’t worry it will be gone soon and life will be soooo good’

A towel with wings that actually lifts you slightly off the floor, so you’re kind of floating above the ground. Tampons that help you sleep better. Perhaps dipped in Lavender.

The Kaffeine Kotex – tampons and towels made with caffeine to give you that extra kick of energy each day.

The Tampax Toastie – A heated pad, like a mini electric blanket that helps ease the pain and keeps you warm in the winter months. Balls will be shrivelling but your vajayjay’s flourishing in its electric fanny blanket. This could come with a remote control so you can alter the temperature whenever needed.

The Playtex Strap On – A towel with a Dildo attached for discreet pleasure throughout your day. This would also come with a remote control.

For the Summer months, a tampon/towel sprinkled with Citronella to help keep the wasps away.

Perhaps the brand Always could bring out some tampons that help improve your memory. ‘Always Remember’. I would be happy paying the 5% tax on these. Or perhaps just a super tampon that you can keep in for the full 7 days without worrying that at the end of a hellish period you may also die. Not much to ask?

What do you think? How could your tampon serve you better? I would love to know your thoughts.

In the meantime, there are some great charities that are helping girls who don’t have access or aren’t able to pay for sanitary products. You can donate any lady sticks and pads, un-used, to these guys and they will pass onto ladies who need them. @pinkparcel @binti.period @redboxprojectuk @always_uk_ireland (end period poverty) @bloodygoodperiod @heygirlsuk

https://www.pink-parcel.com/uk/

https://www.bloodygoodperiod.com

https://www.always.co.uk/en-gb

Homepage

Leave a Reply