I was recently told off by the Doctor for bringing 3 different health concerns into one appointment. Apparently, you’re only allowed to talk about one illness per appointment. WTF?!

After it taking 3 days of being on HOLD to get the appointment and ONE HOUR sat in the waiting room, this really p*ssed me off! If like me you’re a slight hypochondriac but don’t have time to keep booking separate appointments then below is a list to help you get the most out of that one appointment without the doctor even realising.

You’ve got 5-10 minutes. use it wisely!

1.PREPARE Β The night before, Google all your symptoms for each ailment. Look for the worst case scenarios, ask if it could be that first. This eliminates all the bullshit and you can cut straight to what you really worried about.

2.PRIORITIES Only talk about new symptoms first, stuff you’ve had before can wait till the end. For example your probably better off talking first about the consistent headaches than your persistent Thrush.

3. START TALKING as soon as your in the corridor, you’ve usually got a good 30 seconds to get more stuff in before you’ve even sat down.

4. THE ART OF DECEPTION watch some Derren Brown and slip three health concerns into the one appointment without the doctor even realising. This works a treat. EXAMPLE:

You – ”I’ve got terribly swollen glands”

Doctor – ”When did you get those?”

You – ”Just after I got this stomach bug”

Doctor – ”Do you have a temperature?”

You – ”No but I do have a broken ankle”

5.CLOSING This is when you bring up your regular illnesses. You can slide it in here as you know what you need and what it is. EXAMPLE

”Oh whilst your doing the prescription can you sort me out with some more creams? The Haemorrhoids are back”

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