No matter how much I clear out my handbag I always end up carrying about clutter. In my pursuit to de-clutter, I ask should handbags have drawers?
At the beginning of the week I start with a clutch bag, this then gets put into a slightly larger bag and as the week progresses, both are then put into a shopper bag. It’s like the Russian Doll of handbags. It’s got to the point where I collate so much crap, my Tesco bag for life has become my handbag. Not a good look.
The problem is with so much multi-tasking I feel we need bags that multi-task with us. Like a clutch that appears small but really it has a secret compartment where you can fit your life.
By Saturday I have so much stuff in my handbag I have to use a metal detector to find my keys. I am a big fan of @MrsHinchhome and I am trying to do my best to Hinch my handbag by keeping it organised but really It seems there are 3 layers to a handbag that you just cannot avoid. Layer 1: The stuff you really need, like your wallet and keys, should be near the top. Underneath this is cosmetics, hand cream, dry shampoo and probably a bronzer from 1998, below this is a layer of rubbish and gunk.
I think therefore that handbags should have 3 drawers. This would prevent situations like when I needed to brush my hair before a date and after fumbling in my handbag for 10 minutes I found the brush with an open and now hairy lip balm attached to it. No way to smooth my windswept barnet and no way to sooth my lizard lips.
A fourth draw should be added for parents, nothing worse than reaching in to get your phone and pulling out a two day old nappy and people who, like myself carry around a portable pharmacy for my various ailments. Pills to sleep, pills for my stomach, pills for patience. So many pills I’m like a walking Maraca.
What I will never understand is how objects’ that don’t move seem to tangle themselves up so much that even a human finds it difficult to untangle them. I recently spent 20 minutes in the toilet trying to untangle a tampon from my phone charger. A carrot once forced entry to my hand sanitizer which then spilt all over my phone, which was found later, very clean but broken.
In a rush to a meeting last week, I grabbed my bronzing brush only to realise it was now covered in black eye shadow which was now leaking all over my bag. I arrived at the meeting looking like a chimney sweep.
I once turned up late to a meeting and as I arrived and plonked my bag on the table it started vibrating furiously. Somehow my vibrator was in the bag and somehow it had turned on. We all watched in shock as it vibrated across the table. I was just shocked the batteries still worked.
Your bag becomes the equivalent of the I’m A Celebrity Hell Hole Challenge, you never know what you’re going to pull out next. I once screamed in Costcutter when I reached into my handbag and mistook some fake eyelashes for a spider.
If only Ikea did handbags. The Hylla Väska (the shelf bag)I can see it now. White and compact. A mini mobile storage facility which looks like a hanging basket with a houseplant hanging over the top with shelves underneath. I would buy this bag.